“Thoughts do more. Words do much. Actions do much more.”
There was a reason God gave us five senses. Words have a definitive impact on our lives, but words alone cannot do much. They need to be coated with emotion (or no emotion) in order to give them effect. I remember the days when I used to be foolish enough to simply believe the import of words, because I screened those empty words through my own lenses, which of course gave them a different meaning. I am not really past that phase, and I think most of us are not, but now I try my best to understand the other person. It is analogous to situations where we text someone, or call someone, or meet someone. All three situations find us communicating differently, and the least effective communication seems to be the text messages. You’ve got to be either psychic or tuned in to EVERY person’s mood to gauge it through their texts. That is why, most people prefer to communicate in person. Those who are good with words also fall into two categories: those who are good with (just) words, and those who are good with words (also). A conversation with someone in the former category can feel like bliss when you do not know them, but gradually when you start realising that they are just words, you know that they are apt not to be taken seriously. What they give is what they get back. Simple enough. It can make you fall into dangerous zones, because you tend to believe what they say. They put you up on a high pedestal only to make you shriek with fright when you run for the high jump. You need not even test them, because if you’re insightful enough, you will figure out that it’s not worth the investment and time. Actions definitely speak louder than words, and it applies to every facet of our lives.
Somebody I know has had the bad (and quite mad) experience of having dealt with a few which fall in the above-mentioned former category. And she’s completely exhausted now, so much so that her threshold for lending an ear to them has fallen to the baseline. She could actually snap at them or even slap them, because she does not have it in her anymore to be sympathetic to them. Except for genuine reasons. But this has done her more good than bad. Now, she is well-equipped to give them her piece of mind as and when required. And she enjoys doing it. Because she has no other option. That’s the only way she can deal with it. So she transforms into this nasty, irritable, angry young woman and becomes a no-nonsense person for some elements out there. I have seen her in her times of distress, but now she almost laughs them off. She goes to sleep without feeling perturbed or anxious, and she does not care to apologize to someone who would only blame her. But only the day before she told me, “Ah, how I wish I could punch that person. Won’t it be awesome?” To me, the situation seemed volatile, and I imagined a tinderbox which was ready to explode any moment. So I deduced that somewhere, she was still her old self, and hence was only ‘thinking’ about doing something she would ordinarily NEVER do. She seemed calm on the exterior, but I could feel that she was furious inside, and was suppressing words waiting to be unleashed. And they would definitely be emotionally charged. She resorted to the medium of letters and words, and expressed herself. She felt a bit better, but she felt dissatisfied. She seems to me like she’s ready to go in a battlefield, armed with her lethal literary weapons. Yes, she needs a punching bag. And for a change, she seems confident. God help her opponent. No, she’s not a bad person per se, but she just wants to become a bad girl this one time, to prove a point. To fight for herself. To defend herself. To reiterate her words through her actions. High time she encountered someone from the second category.
Speaking of which, (once in a long while) we do come across people falling in the latter category. They are pretty balanced most of the time. They make promises, and fulfill them. If they do not promise, rest assured, they will not do it. But if they say it, trust them that they mean it. And trust them when they do not say anything. Because that’s when they are most likely to spill their beans. They can be as serene as a riverside, but if you do not know them well, you will never get a chance to take a dive in still waters. And all of us know that still waters run deep. I think that’s how I’d describe “strong and silent”. Yes, they might seem too detached, almost bordering on cold, but watch out for their next move. It might make you melt. It will, provided you do not go into a shell while they were away in their own world. Give them time, and they’ll come back rushing to connect with you through their actions, and sometimes through their words. Such ‘sometimes’ are almost equivalent to ‘seldom’, but provided you do not exhaust your patience with them also, it will be worth it. Even these people can be irritating at times, but you’ve got to take a deep breath to calm yourself down. So the key to handle category 1 lies in not waiting on them, and the key to handle category 2 lies only in waiting. Those are the only actions required. Words fail to account for the intensity in both the situations. One is war, and Two is love. But both are battlefields. Maybe that’s why, all actions are fair.