An ashamed citizen who can do nothing

If I don’t write today, I will consider myself a traitor to my country. I don’t know how happy I should feel with this belongingness. I don’t know who these people are, who call themselves Indians, sons of Bharat Mata, and rape her daughters. I don’t think they are “people”. I think they are barbaric aliens, because they do not understand what a girl is, and how a girl is, and before they understand, she becomes “was”. I could not believe a human could be so barbaric when the nation was appalled at the Nirbhaya case in 2012, and today, that feeling is magnified manifold.

I don’t know whether to sympathise with the parents of Asifa, or to pity her soul. How can such a soul ever rest in peace? She was betrayed so many times in her last few days of her life, she was hanging somewhere in between ‘hope’ and ‘hope against hope’. She must have learnt so many lessons during those moments, without even knowing the meaning of ‘sex’, or ‘rape’. But she must have felt pain, and that’s all that matters. Perhaps a great (child) actor could bring to life her screams in a play or a drama or a movie few years down the line, but nobody can possibly even imagine her interpretation of ”life” during those moments. I doubt if there is a need for a film to be made on this. The details are so gory it sounds unbelievable the first time you hear about it, and then, it sinks. Everytime I think of a particular detail, I feel even more appalled. I don’t know how her parents would live the rest of their lives. My heart goes out to them. I don’t know whether they would be asking God for strength to live with her absence or for the strength to forget what happened. Their lives were tougher, and now, they must wonder why Kashmir is called “Heaven on Earth”, when their lives have been turned into a living Hell.

On the other hand is the case of a rape-survivor and a father who lost his life in custody because he was fighting against a BJP MLA. We have turned into a country of savages that roam free. How can this country possibly progress when a girl cannot walk freely? Why should a girl learn to even walk in this country? Maybe, the conservative parents who do not send their daughters far away are correct. My health would be much better than it is if I walked down to my University every single day, but I will have to arm myself with pepper spray/long and unhygienic fingernails/what not, if I really want to survive the 3.5km walk. Is rape an instrument of proving to the world that men and women are not equal? Is this what men are after–a show of power and lust? We are a country where religion is g(l)orified. What exactly is the difference between these people and the ISIS agents? Why should we even care about ISIS when we foster a similar barbarism in our homeland?

So these are the kind of news bits which possibly give motivation to IAS aspirants in India. And what happens after that? They are transferred and compelled to resign if they stand up for the truth. Exactly whom should a girl trust? Should she not trust a neighbour? Should she not trust a temple priest? Should she not trust a father, a brother, or a maternal/paternal uncle? Whom should she trust? What is left for an average Indian woman to lose after she loses her life every single day? She lives in so many souls, and every time a blow struck her body, it was her soul that got mutilated. I don’t even know what to write..flashes of my imagination turn to work everytime I think of the chargesheet. I cannot believe the local police and the Bar Council of Jammu and Kashmir were also involved in hush-hushing the case. Who are these people really? Are these really “people”? Has rape become so “daily routine” that these people are becoming insensitive with every rape case that comes to them? These people are part of the so-called “procedure of law”, when none should be needed for men who rape children and women. Indian Penal Code is part of Public Law, and I think the best justice for these young girls would be for the perpetrators to be handed over to the public. Maybe, it is time to talk about making draconian laws in the Parliament, for the Parliament.

As for me, I am an ashamed citizen of this country, who can do nothing except pen a blog. I feel even more ashamed now.